It's 3:21 on Saturday morning. I'm having my hair done at 10:00 finally. I should be asleep. Naughty Lisa! But, having been using my Happy App and generally having a decent day I'm going with the flow. Happy App recommends thanking people, working on relationships, planning a "best possible future" and a gratitude journal amongst other things. Today I got up, savoured my tea (soya milk, no sugar) whilst marvelling at Billy Bob teeth which were ACTUAL real teeth of a guest on Jeremy Kyle. Three Boohoo dresses arrived which I tried on - keeping all 3! Having settled on today's hospital outfit I slapped on essential make up (stay don't stray, eyeliner, mascara, lipstick) and sped to pathology. I sat alone in the deserted waiting room for perhaps 90 seconds - didn't even feel today's needle! Realised I'd forgotten to call Izzy in research so rearranged for her to take more blood on Tuesday before chemo. I was back home for more tea in an hour. Sometimes it takes an hour just to get to hospital. Beckie popped in for tea in her lunch break and I gave her the bracelet I made for her. I started making them again for something to pass time productively (ie more productive than ironing things which just go off and get their silly selves creased again). Photos to follow! Managed a brief google chat with H, and later, with the Rock who H managed to persuade me, is obviously far from perfect (as I erroneously concluded some months ago), but based on previous behaviour and general good grades, probably shouldn't be suspended from my life. I made another 2 bracelets and for this weeks item of 'not on the list' treats, drank a pint of organic beer.
I read something earlier that is true for me a lot lately - I only tend to blog bad stuff or difficult stuff. It's time to start recording the good stuff, really dig down and find the funny stuff and keep up the gratitude. I can't save the world, I couldn't have saved the cheerleader either - I'm no Hero. I can save my world though, I can save me. We're all dying, I won't and have no desire to live forever. I can aim high though and make sure everything is just another baby step to my long term goals. Secret they may be, difficult too. But not impossible - that's just an excuse word for someone who doesn't want to try.
I shall return on the laptop and see how many typos I can make on a phone blog entry :p but for now - good morning!
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