This morning I decided to actually start making my plans more concrete.
I have emailed a civil celebrant I like the sound of who lives nearest the green burial site (Ketton Green Site) I have chosen after visiting with my oldest and best friend Hayley when she came over from France in November. The journey there was ok with seat reclined but I had to throw up as soon as we were there. I still don't know if this is brain tumour, effects of dural puncture or just the new me but I don't like it -same thing happened when I arrived at the hospice.
I then emailed the site to see if I can ask for a plot in a certain place because Hayley was able to walk so much further and said there was a better feel in one area which I trust her on.
My daughter looks like she's found a fantastic first car, lessons halfway through and my son will soon be off the 50 cc I bought him and onto a 125 complete with body armour, leather trousers and leather boots which is all I can do to help protect him. So they should both have their own transport soon enough, something that took me till 32 to be able to "afford" by sticking it alld on a card and loan!
The children still need to think about what they might to do with the house and I'm glad I can talk this through with them rather than leaving 2 bewildered teenagers in a sudden predicament.
I have felt a much greater sense of control now I've set the funeral wheels in motion. I have only one song I definitely want, a wicker coffin with wildflowers decorating it, only donations from all but children and immediate family, so just 2 wild flowers bouquets or arrangements and donations to be split between Beating Bowel Cancer, St Barnabas Hospice and MacMillan. Hayley (who I should point out is also an executor) knows all the details I've decided on so far, but I thought it wouldn't hurt to publicise my wishes and tell those who I've corresponded with but won't be there.
There is a good chance you'll get a report of the day and maybe an order of service uploaded on this blog too. I think it would be a fitting last post, though it won't be by me obviously.
It annoys me I forgot to take these expenses into account, it means more money taken from the children regardless of when it's paid for. Still it all helps with the decision making. Knowing what should be left. I'm saving anything I get, not having to buy food or use power or heating being in here which is an added bonus! Just the thought of raking some of these funeral expenses back spurs me on to hang in there!