Saturday, 19 January 2008

2007 Feb 21st - New Tattoos on the NHS!

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

Debagged........and no Dr Tom
Current mood: determined
Category: Life

Up at a decent hour this morning, took my New Best Friend to the bathroom with me and spent a good few minutes trying different arrangments to keep it dry and out of harms way whilst allowing me to shower without practising contortion techniques. The line was too short to go over the shower curtain rail for the pump to rest in the sink, the windowsill was too risky as it was wet and slippery and also behind me. Finally I hooked the shoulder bag (thanks mum) over the curtain rail and the pump stayed suspended behind the curtain out of harms way. I didn't use the bathguard - see link

since it appears to cut off the cirulation in my arm after a few seconds and I'm not THAT fast in the shower. Managed to keep the arm dry but got my hair wet grrrr, it didn't need washing.

Ummed and ahhed and chose to wear my Monsoon top - chocolate linen/silk mix with lime appliqued flowers on and a wraparound. The line was nicely hidden mostly apart from my entire arm but then I'd have my coat on too. My nicest newest whitest lacy white short pants were called for - therefore matching bra - they won't need to see that will they? I know it's a bit Judy Finnegan but still.

Got to Lincoln early and sat down with a coffee for five minutes, then got called, half an hour early! Handed over the wad of notes which they were pleased about and sat down with the lovely Ellen? for a chat. She must have had this chat umpteen times but it came across as an original conversation just between us, I like her, not least because when I mentioned it was just me and my daughter at home she assumed she'd be about 4 not 14.

Down to business then, boots off - revealing unshaven legs and navy socks - at least the brown skirt matched my top . Another female radiographer and male student appeared to help me lie on the bed face down - with cushions for my face, knees and ankles. Arms above head, wasn't working in that top! I could feel my line being squished under the sleeve which was tightened at that angle so I had to undo it - Ellen had hold of my pump in the bag, the other two were helping line me up in the laser beams (hit me, hit me, hit me, hit me, hit me with your laser beam - says Frankie) and pulled down my skirt and pants - bet they were glad I showered. They put what I imagined were post-it notes on my bum and lower back either side - they called them markers but I just know they use post its NHS cuts and all that. Oh and a special marker made of wire?? to mark my bumhole, nice. They all ran off to the adjoining room while I went through the doughnut again (CT scanner).

After five minutes chilling out with my nekkid bum in the air my tall dark young male student runs around the bed marking Xs on my backside and then again with the tattoo gun - not as creative as the existing tattoo, just three small dots, but still they were free!

Six hands prised me off the bed - well four as two were holding the chemo pump - into a kneeling position where I adjusted my clothing - picture the scene - pump held aloft by one, student averting eyes but making sure I don't fall off on one side, other woman on the other side making sure I don't fall off. Judy Finnegan bra revealed for all to see as are all my other bits - pants around thighs with skirt. Funny I did my top up first - do I have no shame? So white underwear, dark brown clothing and navy men's socks (size 9 feet what can I do) ladies and gentlemen STYLE and DIGNITY have LEFT the building, I repeat LEFT the building.

After putting my boots, coat and scarf on - managing not to get entangled with the line I went out to finish my coffee and off to town.

Blue Banana was our first destination after lunch (mmm stilton and bacon jacket) for Karys's birthday coat (remember Attitude Clothing - pah) for £13 less than original and it's really nice thick fabric too. Karys was being shy and I made her ask the man with blue hair (I did HAVE to tell him that was the blue I had on my black and blue mohican) if they had any girls coats, and AS I said the coats she insisted were boys were in fact unisex, Duh, don't she know nuffin?

Bought some very cheap basics in Primark and energy was all but sapped leaving New Look empty handed. Felt rough over lunch and on the way home but as Monday and Tuesday - loo trips seem to sort it out, it's not chemo related so must just be Tyson.

Very icy feet and feeling tired are the only things like symptoms from chemo so far, but only had a little over 33 hours so far, so about 16.5ml/84ml of week one.

P.S Tyson says "help me I'm meeeeelting" oh dear, poor thing.

23:15 - 4 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment - Edit - Remove

janey jane jane

You can make me laugh out loud and cry all on the same page! A literary genius I say. xxx

Posted by janey jane jane on Thursday, February 22, 2007 at 07:59
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Billy Bollockchops

I'd best stop bringing cakes around for you, I'd hate for your tattoos to be out of alignment.

Posted by Billy Bollockchops on Thursday, March 01, 2007 at 10:08
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Lisa Left Eye Loopylalalalala

Posted by Lisa Left Eye Loopylalalalala on Thursday, March 01, 2007 at 10:39
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Billy Bollockchops

Awww, Course I'll still bring cakes for you. I nearly bought you a present from Ikea yesterday. I found one of those foot-warmer things that're like a great big, really soft cushion with foot-holes. I couldn't remember if you said you already had one though.

Posted by Billy Bollockchops on Thursday, March 01, 2007 at 14:40

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